Thickburgers and Wimpy Chairs on the QM2

From the Any Publicity is Good Publicity File:

Hardee's Monster Thickburger stirs press:

Just a day after the Monster's rollout Nov. 15, Jay Leno quipped on "The Tonight Show" that the megaburger "actually comes in a little cardboard box shaped like a coffin." On David Letterman's "Late Show," an actor playing the chief of Hardee's corporate parent, CKE Restaurants Inc., in a sketch clutched his chest, then keeled over when asked of any health risks of a burger that size.

Media outlets from Japan, Spain, England, France and Australia have reported about the Monster.

"I don't think any of us anticipated anything like the media uproar we've seen," says Andy Puzder, the real president and CEO of California-based CKE.

Andy must be beside himself with joy!

In related news:

DOZENS of seats on the world's most luxurious cruise liner have collapsed under the weight of obese American passengers.

The chairs -- on the Queen Mary 2 -- are being replaced or repaired.

The seating is mainly in the bar and restaurant areas.

Alstom Chantiers, the French company that provided the liner with all its fixtures and fittings, claimed many of the chairs had buckled under the weight of larger passengers.

"There are some things that need to be changed or replaced," said a spokesman. "For instance, there are some problems with the chairs because some of our passengers are heavier than we imagined.

"It's not an English problem, it's probably more American."

An unnamed former member of the ship's crew said: "We do have many large passengers on the QM2. Most of the passengers are American.

"And we do have 10 restaurants on the ship, so if they are big when they get on, they tend to be bigger when they get off.

Rather than making fun of their guests, I suggest they work harder to ensure their comfort and safety.